Irish Stout Prevail In Barn Burner

Kanata, ON — Fear not, the sun will rise in the east tomorrow as the Irish Stout returned to their winning ways after a monumental upset loss to Peter’s Pirates earlier this week. After delivering an effort on par with the 1968 New York Jets or the 2007 New York Giants, the Pirates faced the Stout for a second time this week. Following their bitter defeat, the Stout were in an ornery mood, but that did not prevent both teams from putting on an exciting display at legendary Entrust Cryptography Field.

The Stout were at full strength for this matchup, with their signal caller, Paul “The Increasingly Mad Bomber” McRae more or less fully recovered from his back injury, James “Bulletin Board Material” Muir, Kirk “They Only Lose When I Don’t Play” Ireland, Bevan “Throw It At My Head” Watkiss, and Ron “Polar Fleece” Burman all ready to play. The Pirates countered with Peter “Joe Namath” Arseneau, Carlos “David Tyree” Nahas, Andrew “Plaxico Burress” Sung, Tong “Don Maynard” Jia, and Liang “Johnny Sample” Yao.

After failing to score on their first possession, the Pirates turned the ball over to the Stout, who proceeded to execute a lightening fast hurry-up play to Burman for a quick 6-0 lead on a long throw from McRae. Nahas snuffed out the conversion attempt with an interception. After another scoreless Pirate drive, Muir scored on another McRae bomb for a 12-0 lead, which extended to 13-0 when Burman caught the PAT. “Oh, yeah, we’re bringing it,” said Muir, “I mean that in the most polite context possible.”

This would not become a Stout rout, however, as the plucky Pirates fought back. Arseneau passed to Nahas and converted to Sung to trim the Stout lead to 13-7. The Stout responded with a long Ireland TD to go ahead 19-7, but Nahas scored again to make it 19-13. The Stout were forced into their only punt of the day, but Ireland intercepted Arseneau on the goal line to set up a McRae to Burman connection and a 25-13 lead. Muir intercepted the Pirate pivot on the next possession and then hauled in a perfectly thrown McRae toss for a 31-13 lead, which became 32-13 after the Watkiss conversion.

Just when the Stout were asserting themselves and threatening to blow out the Pirates, Liang Yao intercepted McRae deep in the Pirate end of the field and scooted the length of the gridiron for touchdown to make the score 32-19. Not to be denied this day, McRae kept heaving long bombs at the Pirate defense with success, hitting Ireland in stride for a 38-19 lead. Despite time running out, Arseneau moved his team down the field and used his rookie slotbacks to score a TD to Sung and a PAT to Jia.

The contest now stood with the Stout ahead 38-26, but whatever flickering hope of another historic upset by the Pirates was extinguished by a Watkiss TD from McRae on the flag pattern. A Burman conversion on a nice dipsy doodle move ended the Stout scoring with them ahead 45-26. A late TD from Nahas and conversion by Sung made the final 45-33 in one of the highest scoring games in league history.

“Just win, baby!” said McRae, echoing the words of the late Al Davis. The Stout now lead the OFL at 5-1, while the Pirates are at 1-5.

BOX SCORE
November 4, 2011
Irish Stout 45 Peter's Pirates 33

Passing
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Arseneau   4 TD, 3 PAT, 2 INT

Receiving
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Nahas      3 TD
Burman     2 TD, 2 PAT
Ireland    2 TD
Muir       2 TD
Sung       1 TD, 1 PAT
Watkiss    1 TD, 1 PAT
Jia        1 PAT

Defense
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Yao        1 INT (TD ret)
Ireland    1 INT
Muir       1 INT
Nahas      1 INT