Kanata, ON — On a balmy fall day at legendary Entrust Cryptography Field, the powerful defending league champion Irish Stout defeated a spunky French Foreign Legion squad 26-0. The Stout fielded veterans Paul McRae, Bevan Watkiss, and Kirk Ireland. However, big tight end Dan Murdock was unavailable, having been involved in an incident with Adam “Pacman” Jones at a local dance bar. Rookie end James Muir was a scratch with an ankle injury, about which he would only say, “I can’t tell you how it happened, but I am pretty sure the activity is illegal in the state of Alabama.” Instead, the Stout fielded rookies Chris Walker and Marie Cote as well as a wily veteran from the OFL’s distant past, Paul Bertels. The Legion squad returned most of their usual roster, Peter Arseneau, Bogdan Nicolescu, Sasha Ruzhynsky, Rami Al-Tayeche, and John O’Connor. They were augmented with rookie wingback Jesusa Tran.
The Stout won the toss and deferred, as is their custom. The Legion failed to score and punted. After a couple of incompletions, McRae found Cote in the endzone for the game’s first score after she slipped behind the bedazzled Tran. Watkiss caught the conversion and the Stout led, 7-0. Once again, the Stout defence held firm as McRae and Cote alternated in providing constant pressure on Legion passers and snuffing out running plays.
McRae went to work again and lofted a pass into the waiting arms of Ireland to extend the lead to 13-0. Conversions proved tough all day, though McRae noted, “I can throw it, but I can’t catch it for ’em.” As always, McRae is noted for his “team first” attitude. He continued, “You can’t spell ‘TEAM’ without ‘ME’.”
On the sidelines, Stout Team President and General Manager McRae was continually fending off trade deals with hard bargaining Legion GM Larisa Christensen, who was heard uttering, “It is simple, you give us Ireland, the league’s leading scorer, and we will ship you this gently used pad of Post-It’s. Is fair, no?”
In the second half, Watkiss hauled in a short pass on a crossing pattern and lumbered into the endzone to make the score 19-0. The Stout’s clever play calling and quick hitting offense seemed to have the Legion in disarray, but they rose up to intercept the conversion attempt as John O’Connor picked off the McRae throw. “‘Twas just like back in Croke Park, gents!”, O’Connor remarked, “Now let’s kick their arses!”
It was not to be as the Legion was having trouble moving the ball into scoring range. Their woes continued as Ireland intercepted Arseneau and ran it back to bulge the lead to 25-0. Quickly lining up for the conversion, the Stout added the single point to their total as Cote scored on a sweep right to make the score 26-0. On their final possession, behind their scrambling QB, the Legion moved close to the Stout goal line. On fourth down, however, their hopes were dashed as Arseneau’s pass to Ruzhynsky was batted away at the last second by Walker on the goal line.
October 9, 2008
Irish Stout 26, French Foreign Legion 0
McRae 3 TD, 1 PAT, 1 INT
Arseneau 1 INT
Watkiss 1 TD, 1 PAT
Cote 1 TD
Ireland 1 TD
Cote 1 PAT
O'Connor 1 INT
Ireland 1 INT (TD ret)
Hail to the Redskins! The Washington Redskins have recovered from their debacle of an opener to win 4 straight, including last week AT Dallas and this week AT Philadelphia. Former Miami Hurricane Clinton Portis propelled the ‘Skins with 29 carries for 145 yards against the Eagles.
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Kanata, ON — Another OFL season is upon us as the day dawned over a crisp Entrust Cryptography Field. The play did not live up to the surroundings, however, as the Irish Stout prevailed over the French Foreign Legion in a sloppily played game.
Both teams returned several veteran stars while adding some exciting new talent via the draft. The Legion lined up wily QB/slotback Peter Arseneau, the always volatile QB/wideout Louis Aubin, flanker Bogdan Nicolescu, split end Rami Al-Tayeche, and two rookies, tight end Sasha Ruzhynsky from the Red Army and wingback John O’Connor, out of Davy Byrnes Pub in Dublin. The Stout countered with veteran QB and former OFL MVP Paul McRae, speedy slotback Kirk Ireland, and a trio of tight ends, Bevan Watkiss, Dan Murdock and rookie James Muir, from Soft Hands University.
After winning the toss, the Stout deferred and the Legion took the field on offense. Aubin launched a few of his customary rockets into the geese milling about in the parking lot and the Legion punted. On their first possession, McRae uncharacteristically threw a few passes in the dirt, perhaps the result of his legendary hard-partying ways. On third down, however, McRae showed his game and hit Muir on a long touchdown and followed that with a quick strike to Ireland for the conversion. The Stout led 7-0.
The Legion, as is their custom, switched signal callers and put Arseneau in the pivot spot. He managed to drive his team down the field with quick passes to Nicolescu and O’Connor, but the drive stalled as nose tackle McRae nearly made an interception on a pass in the flat.
McRae continued to miss on both short and long passes and the Stout punted a few times until McRae hit Muir on another bomb down to the goal line, following an acrobatic Muir interception. Ireland scored on the reverse, but the conversion failed. The Stout led 13-0.
Cursing in several languages was heard as the Legion lined up and determinedly drove down the field on short passes, the drive hitting paydirt as Arseneau connected with Aubin on the goal line for a disputed touchdown. The conversion pass sailed high, however, and the Stout lead was trimmed to 13-6.
The Stout defense lived up to its name and shut out the Legion the rest of the way. On their final possession, McRae heaved another long touchdown to Muir and then wafted a short pass to Murdock for the conversion to increase the bulge to 20-6 as the horn sounded.
“The defense bailed us out today,” said head coach McRae, “This is going to cost me at the pub later!”. Stout General Manager and Club President McRae were thrilled with the win. “It was a great victory for our organization. I knew if we stuck with me, I mean, McRae as head coach we would be OK. We are continuing to ignore Lane Kiffin’s calls.”
October 2, 2008
Irish Stout 20, French Foreign Legion 6
McRae 2 TD, 2 PAT
Arseneau 1 TD, 1 INT
Ireland 1 PAT
Murdock 1 PAT
Muir 2 TD
Aubin 1 TD
Ireland 1 TD
Muir 1 INT